My dad was a loving, caring man. He regularly cared for family and neighbors, including one of the most difficult personalities in their small town. Helping with rides, household projects and companionship. But he struggled with Jesus’ admonition to love our neighbor as ourselves. He mentioned it often.

Loving the neighbor wasn’t hard for dad. What was hard for him was Jesus’ suggestion that self-love is the basis for neighbor love. Dad was aware that most of us don’t actually love ourselves as well as we might. Sure, there is plenty of selfishness and narcissism to go around. One needn’t be cynical about human nature to acknowledge that. But even selfishness and narcissism (not the clinical kind, just the regular kind) are not self-love. They are often grounded in insecurity, fear and a sense of “not being enough.”